this is the other side of the lookout's life. for four days i labored, emptying the place i'd rented for the past two years and the house i'd been care-taking for the past four months.
the big question was: could i get everything in this tiny space? obviously not. a crate of clothes, a large computer desk ensemble, a backpack, and a bookcase reside at the cancer society shop. marilyn of vagabond rose took the small fridge, lamp, boombox, and picture-frames, most of it going to her country cabin. susan recovered her floor-lamp and marilyn of the american and language and culture institute received her birthday present: a banjo-ukelele bought on the internet. (she said she played all night. it really sounds like a banjo. amazing.)
the rest? yes, by gum. and there's still a bit of room for the stuff here at the lookout. i've a new room nov. 1st. until then, i'm a free man.
certainly, that's the way it feels. perhaps cause our family moved thirty times by my graduation from high-school. add 90 more times for 45 fire seasons. and then there's been new york, berlin, oxford, the island of rhodes, berkeley, santa cruz, and chico. (my head's beginning to swim.) with everything put away i begin to have travel fantasies. and i keep thinking of the woody allen movie from this week: cristina barcelona where all the characters go through intense experiences, then return to their normal patterns of behaviour.
i've just gotten another great course
which promises to be exactly what i've believed: we remain the same personality until there's brain damage.
when we left hamilton, montana i was nine years old, a preacher's kid. i remember as we left town how the streets and trees lost their mana. they became distant and foreign, as if the life had gone out of them. and i seem incapable of going back to a place once i've really left. perhaps this keeps me an eternal child, always living in the present moment. i asked for change and adventure and that's what i've gotten.
beware of what you ask for!
i've reorganized my photos into large groups: chico, dance, theater, lookout, etc. hopefully you'll discover something new and exciting.