Monday, January 31, 2011

sincerity may be the biggest sin


or, as someone said, "if you can fake it, you've got it made." moliere's tartuffe a case in point.

aren't we always playing a role, and isn't naturalness just another one? here's an aphorism from la rochefoucauld: "Most young people think they are being natural when really they are really just ill-mannered and crude." of course, i've never been guilty of this. well, maybe never.

i do rather regret not having an established role in life. i've never been a father (as far as i know), never a breadwinner, always the best man and never the groom. and career! that's a joke. nobody ever became famous for looking out the window. or even well-paid. life's flown by on a butterfly's wings. and the grasshopper will never be ready for winter. said some anonymous elder, "You'll understand later that one keeps on forgetting old age up to the very brink of the grave." i can vouch for that.

actually, i think of myself as an entertainer. true, my performances have been haphazard and fitful. once i gave the closing prayer at my father's church. i hadn't practiced and mumbled something, terribly embarrassed. and best man at a friend's wedding, i didn't realize i'd have to give a speech. what a godawful moment. it pays to practice.

and that's what i'm saying, we can't get by in life by always telling the truth. yes, at the wedding i could have said, 'this is doomed' which is was, but i couldn't bear to rain on someone else's parade. a role played artfully well can be a delight. check out stand-up comedy by judy carter. one could do worse than get thru this existence as a comic.

one last quote from teacher/playwright/director luis valdez: "play any role you want, only don't identify with it. pick it up and drop it as needed."

just created a disguising website. i invite you to check it out: http://www.wix.com/firelookout/smokysun